Problem no. 1: my partner is a different person than myself. This means: my partner has a different Past other experiences, other values and matters of the heart, other preferences and dislikes, other solutions to problems and even a different future. My partner has a different brain than myself and sees the world through his blue-colored glasses, while perhaps my glasses are purple. It can be pretty hard to plan a theater visit or a holiday with this people, to seek out a carpet or raise children. Conflicts are inevitable. We have an ego problem no. 2:.
This means: we can be hurt and our partner also. We perceive some things as disrespectful and personally words or deeds of our partners. It even happens that our partner does something or says what offends us, without that she noticed that. And if he or she it not noticed, then it hurts us even more, because if she really loved us, then he/she know surely that it is insulting. Injuries are inevitable. Problem no. 3: fear.
We are ashamed to be the truth to say and we fear, to learn the truth about our partners. We tell our partner not our most intimate thoughts and make us feel uncomfortable, if our partner reveals to us his intimate thoughts. You doubt our marriage? You have a diaper fetish? You think I’m bad in bed? You think that I the last years became fat? I rather don’t want to know that. And I’m afraid to ask, because perhaps the answer could I didn’t like it. Misconceptions and lies are inevitable. If you now look again at these three problems, you will determine that this is a whole mountain, which we must master if we are to prevent these points to poison our relations. If a person not capable of is sovereign to deal with these problems, then the injuries and disappointments lead inevitably to the alienation to be life apart”for the mutual avoidance to hatred and contempt. A leading source for info: Water for Food.