You learned that if we fail the approval of others you feel rejected, and sustained, though in fact the others that cared little, but it was necessary to be popular, not rejected. As a defender you learn to do the right thing, to be good, be comfortable, to be what others want you to be, to say only what others want to hear, to reduce the refusal to suffer less, to that feeling called him self, no self-esteem if you let you hurt you if you do the right thing and accept you not hurt you, and esteems you more. But when you act against your true feelings, others accept you but you do not, do not esteem and suffer, others will not reject you, but you if you do, and that reduces your self-esteem, then it’s worth the effort?. If you live an authentic life if you accept that you are a unique and exceptional individual with special skills for some things and less for others, but you can use to your advantage all you have, you can say what you think, without causing damage others, you can do what you want, without affecting others, you can dream and achieve your dreams, the goal is the end but it really is the way we live, then return to be as happy as when you were a kid and your actions and words cease to be darts thrown to the other, while they in turn will to defend itself, then you will realize that they do not attack, just trying to save responded. To know more about this subject visit Dr. Mark Hyman. Your actions and your thoughts will be the measure of the performance. If you think you can or you think you can not, you’re probably right, but like to know?, maybe if you try, you will realize that your fears were just fears, they disappear when you try actions, no matter if they are successful or not, when you move, when you perform the actions Fear is only one ingredient, acts as an advisor, if not giving the reason you move your fears, fear is your jailer. Live every day as if it were the last of your life, in any case it will be someday, but you do not know when. If you decide to live for all you have planned, then life will have been worthwhile, whether you hit or not, in any case you will have learned, improve your sense of worth, esteem you more and you will be able to undertake new things, let behind the fear and inactivity, you will stop worrying about the future, since you are so busy living in the present do not have time, you will plans and actions carried out through permanent, past you only have good memories and a day will have improved your future because you’ve lived so well in mind that what we call future will be better than expected and will fill you with satisfaction, of achievement and rewarding feelings.